Sports Victories Increase Generator Capacity

Sep 092006
 

I’m an ocasional reader of the Korean Central News Agency of DPRK (KCNA) which is the external propaganda wing of North Korea. It’s a priceless resource for the study of the silliness of political propaganda. One of my favorites recently was an article in which a North Korean woman’s soccer victory was responsible for the increase in the country’s electrical output:

Ri Chol Su, a worker of the Pyongyang Thermal Power Complex, said:
“I was greatly excited to hear the news that our girls won the world championship. This encouraged us to achieve an unprecedented high boost in the electricity production today.

We believe this signal victory represents the spirit of Korea. We workers will step up the building of a great prosperous powerful nation in the same spirit displayed by them”.

Source: News From KOREAN CENTRAL NEWS AGENCY of DPRK

Who knew that generators could spin faster if people are excited about a soccer victory? Of course, on a disapointing note, Reuters decided to report on this story as if it was legitimate news.

Chicago Loses Big Shoulders

Sep 092006
 

What’s going on Chicagoans? Have you lost as sense of manly honor? First you ban a food that no one eats, Foie Gras. But that one made a bit of sense. I’m sure that all waterfowl in the city of Chicago are registered Democrats and you have to look out for your constituents.

But then I find this quote in an article about the name change of Marshall Field’s to Macy’s:

I owe it to the memory of my grandmother,” James, who works at the nearby Art Institute, said of her vow never to shop at Macy’s.

Source: Store’s fans protest name change in Chicago – Yahoo! News

Are you kidding me? The city of the great fire, Al Capone, Dick Butkus and all things slightly seedy and mean has become a whimpering mass of whiners who are really worked up about the name change of a department store. Will someone go down to Macy’s and show them what happens to protestors show up in the Loop?

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